“We need more people who are more interested in what they can contribute than in what they can collect.” Vance Havner
by Dr. Terry Etter, President of Men’s Life Small-Group Bible Study
Observers of modern men have made some sobering comments lately. Gordon Dalby, in his book Healing the Masculine Soul, says men have become lost, “cast adrift from the community of men.” Stu Weber, in Tender Warrior, writes that “today’s real men are a vanishing breed and that it is killing our culture.” Bob Hicks, in The Masculine Journey, says men are experiencing a profound alienation from God, themselves, and each other.
What is the solution? Part of it is simple: Men must involve themselves in a relational community with other men around God’s Word.
As part of a men’s Bible study ministry for almost 10 years, I’ve learned a great deal about what does and does not work when it comes to attracting and holding men in small groups. Here are some key principles:
1. Men Must Be Personally Invited
Men typically do not respond to small groups without a personal contact, preferably from a friend. Don’t expect men to respond to announcements in church bulletins or flyers. They simply won’t. That is why leaders need to invest their time in developing a system of personal invitation. Plan on inviting three times the number of men you expect.
One leadership team met together several times for the purpose of writing every man’s name down and then assigning those names for follow-up. It takes that level of attention to get men to participate.
2. Have Shared Leadership
Men’s ministries most often fail because they are initiated and led by one man rather than a team of leaders. The motivation and drive of a single person with a heart for reaching men may be enough to pull off a single event, but it is not enough to sustain ministry. Shared leadership not only blends a variety of spiritual gifts in the ministry, but also allows for leaders to “cover” for each other. Men’s small groups should have a minimum of two leaders for a group size of 8 to 10.
3. Groups Need an Outreach Mind-set
When men experience the benefits of a small group, it’s tempting to become inward and exclusive. There is a tension between being comfortable with the men in your existing group and inviting new men. Small groups must maintain an outward focus by inviting new and preferably unchurched men. Failing to do so will cause the group to become static as it loses the challenge and energy new members can bring. Smaller, more intimate accountability groups should become the place for deeper levels of fellowship for small group “veterans.”
4. Meet for a Specific Period of Time in a Comfortable Place
Men are reluctant to make long-term, open-ended commitments. I often say at our leadership workshops that men are “springloaded” to the “bailout” position. We live in an era where most people are overly busy and not committed to anything. If you are trying to reach unchurched men in particular, you must offer them a short-term experience with an option to renegotiate their commitment and opt out if they wish.
Seven one-hour meetings is a good length. The Men’s Life Bible study resources reflect the seven-session format. We have also found that virtually all the men do return to the study because the small-group experience is meeting a critical relational need in their lives.
For many unchurched men, a church building is an unfamiliar, sometimes intimidating place. We urge groups to meet in members’ homes or in places more familiar and less threatening. If your group includes men from several denominations or if it crosses racial or cultural boundaries, then a home, workplace, or other familiar location is a good place to gather.
5. Do Not Assign Homework
Men are unlikely to complete homework assignments, such as reading Scripture passages and writing answers in a study manual. Rather than show up and be embarrassed that they didn’t do the work, they just won’t show up at all. The approach runs counter to the way most of us were taught, but you will encounter fewer problems in your group if you do not assign homework.
Obviously, homework can be assigned and expected in a small group made up of mature Christians whose motivation level is more advanced.
6. Allow Men to Discover Truths From the Bible for Themselves
Don’t lecture. The key responsibility of the leader is to facilitate discussion by asking open-ended questions that invite answers. This principle is essential for having a successful small-group Bible-study experience.
The Bible is unchartered territory for most men. If they don’t feel in control or know the answer, they will soon decide not to come back. It’s better to use a format which invites the group member to participate by giving his own understanding of the meaning of the passage. There is no pressure to come up with the “right” answer. Rather, each person is allowed to uncover the truths of God’s Word in a self-discovery approach. A good small-group leader, then, will facilitate this discovery process rather than set himself up as the expert.
7. Don’t Ask Men to Do Something for Which They Are Unprepared
Be especially careful not to call randomly on men to read Scripture unless you ask for volunteers or are given prior permission. An increasing number of men today are unable to read or are embarrassed to do so in public. Don’t ask group members to pray without seeking prior permission. If you do have a group member pray, it’s a good idea to let the group know that you have gained his permission beforehand. As leader, you generally should take the lead in prayer.
The small group setting is pivotal to developing a relational community for men. This truth is at the heart of the Promise Keepers movement. The leaders of Promise Keepers know that the only way a man will become a Promise Keeper is to enter into a vital relationship with God through His Word and with other brothers who will help him keep those promises.
The basic purpose for beginning this type of outreach ministry is to provide a consistent, well-organized, spiritual Sunday school class for the residents of a housing project or a local community. Some advantages of this type of outreach are:
Provides a Sunday school growth outlet for a cramped mother church with little or no extra room for expansion
Provides a small, close-knit fellowship which may be preferred over a large church
Provides a means of getting the gospel to the lost.
The main goal is to win people to Christ; therefore, emphasis should not be on establishing a “religion” but on developing a definite “relationship” with the people. There should be a concerted effort to build a warm, loving, Christ-like relationship with the people; and, in so doing, credibility with the community will be established.
To begin with, the format should be a single service on Sunday morning. The service should contain a combination of worship, congregational and special singing, testimonies, prayer requests, and an interesting Bible lesson.
Just as the term “outreach” implies, it is a labor of love that “gives” and does not take back. It is impossible to love without giving and to give without loving.
Preparation
Once the chapel ministry is begun, don’t stop! This type of ministry is not meant to be a one-time effort. It should continue indefinitely. Many churches begin outreaches; but when the enemy begins to fight and problems begin to occur, they quit. Don’t let this happen. Plan on success!
Faithful workers are going to have to be recruited for teaching and weekly visitation. In the outreach ministry in the housing projects or in the community, there must be weekly visitation to each apartment or to the homes in the neighborhood. Workers must visit during the week and on Saturday and encourage the residents to attend the Sunday services. Personal selection is the best way to get qualified, dependable workers. They should be contacted on a one-on-one basis, told of the work for them to do, and then asked to pray about it and get God’s direction.
Plans will have to be made to visit every apartment or home in the complex or community. Each local family should be well-informed of the services of the outreach chapel. Attendance in the chapel rises and falls on the amount of time spent in visitation.
Procedure
The first consideration is finding a place to have church. If it is in a neighborhood, a vacant church or building would be an excellent location. Even a house or apartment would be suitable if it is strategically located. Many of the housing projects have a community room (sometimes even a separate building) that would be adaptable for a Sunday school class. Step one is to get permission from the administrator of the project to hold religious services. At this juncture, it is well to point out to the person in charge the following positive reasons for the ministry:
Give assurance that the services are interdenominational and that all faiths are welcome.
Relate that it is more than just a weekly “religious service.” Point out that the ministry is to the “total person.” There will be special dinners for the residents, socials, bus trips, films, etc. Show that your purpose is in the “community spirit” and that the residents will benefit in many ways other than just as a Bible class.
Promise to be there each and every week.
Promise to take good care of the facilities.
Point out that the service will not be a “preaching” type but will be a “teaching service”— one which will involve all who attend.
After securing the building, weekly visitations must take place. Saturday seems to be the best day, since the Sunday church services will be fresh in the minds of the people. Always have an inspiring and motivating Sunday class. The way the class is conducted will determine whether or not the people come back. If it is interesting and full of fresh and exciting ideas, they will return. But it if is dull and dry, they just will not come back.
Promotion
Ideally, due to the small numerical size of an outreach chapel, there is one built-in, ongoing form of promotion. This is the bond of fellowship that exists between the attendees. As they continue to worship from week to week, love and a deeper understanding of each other begin to develop. Every person seeks to be recognized by his own peer group. Everyone wants someone to listen to his “opinion.” The chapel program provides the opportunity. Promotion helps to do the following:
Binds the group into a strong Biblical fellowship, which is conducive to the unity of all factors.
Welcomes others to participate in a non-church, sociable environment. This helps in providing eligible prospects to add to the visitation list.
Plan to begin right away. This outreach ministry will prove to be one of the most rewarding that the church will ever initiate.
How would you like to build your church into a mighty host of flag-waving, Bible-thumping, eager beaver believers and get it growing, into a healthy and flourishing bunch of far right conservatives? You could have people begging to come to Christ in your services and send attendance out the roof! How would you like for your church to be known as “the church where it’s happening”? Just think of it—you could grow an army of Goliath-slaying Davids in only six weeks. It’s all here for you! What you need is a vigorous, Satan-bashing, teeth-gnashing, gut-wrenching discipleship program. If members are not beating down doors and heaping hell fire and condemnation on their neighbors heads they are not being properly discipled!
Oh really? Do we have a problem here? Is that how it works? I don’t think so! Many have a distorted view of what discipleship really is and how it works in the church. Here are my thoughts.
Is your church considered to be growing, healthy, and flourishing? Are people coming to Christ in your services? Is attendance on the increase? Are new converts being added to the church regularly? If this is the case, God is obviously blessing in wonderful ways. This scenario represents an ideal for which we should all be striving.
In order for a church to experience real growth it is certainly necessary to win new converts, but that is only the first step. Few churches, if any, are able to sustain growth without a vigorous discipleship program. The opposite is also true. If members are not being properly discipled they are not out winning new converts. Thus making disciplesof every convert is the key to success for any church. But who will do this and how?
To disciple new converts in a growing church you need a host of spiritually qualified workers among the men and women of the congregation. Otherwise many people will not get the needed help in the initial stages of Christian growth. If we aren’t vigilant, sudden bursts of growth soon decline as new converts drift away due to lack of structure to take them to the next level. To put it simply, without proper guidance they most likely will never become strong, mature Christians and disciples of Christ.
Now we have an enormous problem. The pastor is the spiritual leader; shouldn’t it be his sole responsibility to nurture these new Christians? But we quickly learn that the pastor is already approaching overload on what he is able to accomplish. He simply cannot add something else to an already vigorous agenda. Again, who will do the discipling and how?
To accomplish this we must raise up a host of qualified men and women who can mentor new converts and help establish them in the faith. We must know what we believe, why we believe it, and be able to teach it to others. The goal is to make disciples who can then repeat the process in the life of another convert thus creating mature Christians.
We do this by following Christ’s example. Clearly He came to seek and to save that which was lost (Luke 19:10). He came that men might believe in Him (John 20:31). What was His plan to reach a lost, sinful, and dying world? Most of His ministry was invested in a few men. He trained them daily as He encouraged, corrected, and worked His ministry before them. Regardless of what He did, they were His main focus. He invested in making disciples so that when He left they would be able to carry on the work without Him. Christ’s entire ministry strategy depended on how well these men were taught and grounded in the truth.
Before Jesus left this earth He commanded His followers, “Go and make disciples of all nations” (Matthew 28:18). By this command we readily understand His priority. He spent three intensive years doing discipleship, pouring Himself into these 12 men. Christ has set the example. As we become strong in the faith, we are to care for others so that they in turn can become disciples.
The Church of God has answered Christ’s command by producing a dynamic discipleship program designed specifically for the local church. The program comes in two parts titled Jesus Walk and Faith Walk. The first deals directly with new converts and the latter with the doctrine of the Church of God. Due to the emphasis of this article we are only highlighting Jesus Walk. Both programs will be presented in detail at the upcoming Lay Consultation in August (see accompanying ad). Upon completion of Jesus Walk believers will . . .
understand the meaning of salvation and the responsibility that goes with following Christ.
learn that being a disciple is a call to serve in order to fulfil the Great Commission.
gain a greater appreciation for the Bible, God’s Holy Word.
see how prayer, worship, and stewardship go hand in hand in becoming mature Christians.
understand how our relationships and lifestyle impact our worldview as Christians.
learn about the necessity of the Holy Spirit in living the empowered life.
embrace the need for the church and fellowshipping with those of like faith.
If we are to follow Christ’s example we must make disciples of all believers. Only through discipleship of believers can a vision for living the Christian faith be properly communicated, thus showing each believer how they can have an eternal impact on the lives of others.
80% of Americans are unchurched. The growth being experienced is primarily transfer growth.
195 million Americans say, “I do not have a born-again experience.” We have become the third largest mission field in the world.
No county in the USA has a higher church population now than it did 10 years ago.
There is no statistical difference any researcher (Gallup, Barna, etc.) can find in those who claim to be Christian and those who do not as far as divorce, death, etc., is concerned.
The USA is the 13th largest receiver of missionaries.
A pastor was once asked if he was concerned about all of the Jehovah’s Witnesses who regularly visited in his community. He replied, “I’m not so worried about them as I am about some of my own members who are ‘Jehovah’s Bystanders.’”
Many people, like the local church lay coordinators who are involved in identifying and motivating laity, realize that one of the church’s greatest blessings is also one of its greatest burdens.
The blessing is the fact that the church has at its disposal a vast army of volunteers who are willing to be trained and involved in ministry. These volunteers are willing to sacrifice thousands of combined hours of labor at no cost to the local congregation. The burden is that you have to go and find them and then convince them that they need to commit five or six hours a week to service and two or three additional hours for training and discipleship. To mobilize a volunteer organization like the local church requires real leadership skills. Here are some guidelines to help people move from bystanders to witnesses for Christ.
Show That Ministry Is for Everyone.Many people remain spectators because they feel that ministry is the turf of the pastor and present church leadership, and they do not want to usurp power. Through teaching, preaching and the printed media, show that all believers are special and are needed to do ministry inside and outside the local church. Many people in the church have professional or technical skills and can be enlisted for active service.
Develop an Interview Process.Even if your church is small don’t overlook the “power of the listening ear.” Ask the key question, “What are your gifts and talents?” Find out what makes them happy or sad. This can be a clue to their anointing and their ministry. Discover their feelings about the church. Ask, “Are there things you’d like to contribute to the church but have never been asked to do?” Find out what changes they would like to see in the church in the area of evangelism and outreach. The key is not only to listen but to really hear what is being said. What comes out of these meetings can be the difference in people remaining bystanders or in becoming active participants.
Redefine the Concept of “Leadership” and “Responsibility.” Many times people will not respond to volunteer duties in the church because their success is gauged by the amount of work they do. The old model of leadership is to be at the church every time the doors are open and once you begin a task you can never quit. It’s the “you serve until you die” syndrome. First, people must be motivated internally. This is the work of the Holy Spirit. They have to have an internal want to, God has to first do a work in their lives. Once God has spoken, then the recruiter must allow for levels of participation. Some will be able to offer more time and effort than others. Give the work a time frame. Let people know there will be an opportunity to rethink and refocus their leadership roles. Let them know that ministry will be “shared.” A potential source of burnout is when people think, “I’ve got to take it all over and do it myself.” Burnout is why a great many people who were active in other churches are “bystanders” in yours. They don’t want to be “used” again so they don’t volunteer for anything.
Give the People a “Challenge” and a “Chance”.Take a look at what is going on in the church body. Ask the pastor to preach a series on involving laity in ministry. List every active ministry and have this list available for the prospective workers. People will respond when they feel that there is a real need for their services.
In hundreds of Church of God congregations across North America, men are discovering spiritual vitality in small-group Bible study through LifeBuilders Men’s Ministry. LifeBuilders is a full-fledged program for encouraging both men in the church and men of the community to grow together spiritually. The program has a fourfold purpose focusing on spiritual, social, community service, and soulwinning aspects of a man’s life. This encourages the men’s group to grow in Christ and reach out to the unsaved.
The success of “Promise Keepers” and “LifeBuilders” conferences gives evidence that this is needed and desired by men seeking the things of God. We talk about numbers in attendance as the measure of a successful effort. Large crowds are appreciated, however, let’s not overlook the importance of the intimate small gathering where all men have a chance to participate in a meaningful way.
Ownership in the group and the feeling of being important are additional benefits that come not only to the group but also to the individual. Meaningful growth comes when one sits down with men week after week and seeks to strengthen their walk and develop personal accountability . . . with their help.
A personal one-on-one relationship is the most effective ministry opportunity we will ever have. It’s called disciplining or mentoring and is encouraged in the Bible. Two mornings a week can be set aside where two men meet together and encourage one another in Christ. This could become an exciting thing. Many now prefer the small group and actively pursue the one-on-one relationship . . . you may also once you have experienced it.
“For the Son of man is come to seek and to save that which was lost” (Luke 19:10).
The number one priority of our Lord Jesus was to reach people. Just think about it! This was the only reason He left the beauty and splendor of heaven. Indeed, the Bible says, “For ye know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that, though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor” (2 Corinthians 8:9). As believers we know that reaching people is the highest priority of the church, yet it seems that many times our efforts are spasmodic. We seem to have motion but no mission. If we went duck hunting the way we go witnessing or evangelizing the neighborhood, we would go out into the backyard, point our shotgun up into the air, shoot aimlessly and hope that some poor duck would fly into the bullet!
How do you hunt ducks?
First, find a pond around which ducks hang out. Second, go in with something to entice the ducks; a duck caller for instance. Wait until the duck are within range, get as close to the ducks as possible then take aim and fire. After they have felt the impact of your shot set up your retriever to bring in the catch.
How do you reach people?
Find your place to work. Maybe it is where you pastor or perhaps it is a community where you live or visit regularly. When you drive into this place realize that God has appointed you to find a way to reach the people who live there.
Step One: Get Organized.
Invest the small amount of money needed to purchase large index cards. On these cards place the names and addresses of the people you meet (if you’re into computers, you can create a database file). On these cards place all of the information you can find about each individual. How many children? What are their names? Where do they go to school? What is their place of employment? Where does their spouse work? File your cards in alphabetical order and put them in a safe place.
Step Two: Make Contact.
Start making regular contact with the people in your prospect file. Write on the card when you last made contact, and the response you got. Place them on your mailing list and keep them informed about the activities of the church. On special occasions, send the children a note about a class you have available for them or a youth activity.
Step Three: Take Aim and Shoot!
Vance Havner once said, “We have become canvassers looking for members instead of gatherers looking for souls.” Reach these people! Work your index cards! Send cards, letters, promotions, brochures, newsletters, make phone calls and personal visits (a personal visit is the “flesh and blood” edition of the Word). This is hard work. Do you know that hard work alone will not bring the best results? It takes hard work and correct work. Some of the poorest people in the world are the hardest working. Some of our smaller churches have pastors worry themselves to death with many activities. If they start reaching more people they can let go of some of the less important task. Take aim!
Step Four: Train Others.
Continue to expand your prospect file and continue to work the file. Then begin training others to become responsible for portions of the city or community. The can take one or more blocks, a district or a whole community. Keep a master file in your office but show some of your trustworthy people how to begin a prospect file for their prescribed area. Your goal is to work yourself out of a job by spending your time training them and then letting them do the work. After some years the ideal situation would be to hire a full-time minister of outreach and evangelism for the local church.
Who are our prospects?
There are two types of people in your community. Those who attend your church and those who do not! Every person in your community is a prospect.
The best prospects are the people who visit your church. How you treat your visitors the first time will dictate whether they come back again. Find a way to tactfully get their names and addresses and add these to your index cards to your list.
The next best prospects are people who have attended your church before. If you were selling cars, the best prospect would be the person who walked into your showroom. Your second best prospect would be the person who had bought a car from you before. In many instances there are people in a community who attended the Church of God, but for some reason they dropped out. Why? Lack of interest? Hurt feelings? Bad marriages? With the right kind of motivation they might drop back in. Begin developing a list of people who used to attend your church. Go through the membership roll, look in old Sunday school records, ask members of the church—in short, reach these people.
Other sources of good prospects are people who know someone in your church, newcomers to the community, and other believers who may be dissatisfied with their church.
Joe Girard is a world-famous salesman and is even listed in the Guiness Book of World Records. He says, “If I had to name the tools that work best to build my business, the list would include the telephone, my prospect file, my mailing list and my business cards. I guard my card file of customers practically with my life. I keep two sets. There is no way I could ever get all that information together again.” Can we do any less for Jesus? As long as you follow these simple procedures you will never lack for contacts in your church ministry. Let’s start reaching people today!
The laity are needed. The work of the church is too big a task for just a select few no matter how gifted or how trained they may be. The doctrine of the laity is so important, that if adequately understood and properly expressed in the life of God’s people, it can bring about a spiritual awakening that will revolutionize the life and ministry of the church.
Any lover of the universal church, and specifically the Church of God, must be concerned with its future, the only future which cannot and must not anticipate retirement. To be wedded to today is to be a widower tomorrow. We live in a new fast-paced, technological society that calls for dramatic change in thinking and action. Most of our present boards, agencies, commissions, associations and departments arose from our early history. The change that has come has been within the structures, not in new structures. Dramatic change is needed in the following areas:
Perception. The laity must be considered equal partners in ministry and recognized as priests in the marketplace. Teamwork with the pastor and his staff is emphasized and well-developed. It would be revolutionary to cultivate such a level of teamwork with lay leaders.
Enablement. In order for lay ministry to flourish, the support of voting ministers is needed. Laity must be given the responsibility of making decisions in the church that affect their future. Lay leaders must be a vital contributor to ministry, not just “another pair of hands.”
Education. The laity must be able to defend their beliefs and share them with others. They must become students of the Word. The laity deserve to have an opportunity to receive education that will motivate, educate and continuously train them to enhance teamwork, pride of workmanship, personal growth and productivity.
Training. Training and discipling are needed in the ministry of elders and deacons. Training is needed in the area of outreach and evangelism so that lay people can be fruitful in ministry.
Outreach. Ministry has to take place beyond the confines of the local church. We need to reach beyond our walls not only in public relations type ventures but in hard-hitting, soulwinning evangelism efforts. The laity must be released for ministry. This aggressive outreach goal must involve the laity in winning the lost to Christ and getting them into the local church, discovering their “giftedness,” affirming and motivating them, training and discipling them, and giving them meaningful opportunities for service.
The future awaits us, a future which will not tolerate yesterday’s church in today’s world, let alone the world of tomorrow. This is an hour of challenge! And of promise! The choice before the church as we face the future is to continue with our present pattern and style of ministry or to allow for a “second reformation” . . . a reformation of the released power of the laity (God’s people) in the world today. We truly need holy boldness.
The blessing is the fact that the church has at its disposal a vast army of volunteers who are willing to be trained and involved in ministry. These volunteers are willing to sacrifice thousands of combined hours of labor at no cost to the local congregation. The burden is that you have to go and find them and then convince them that they need to commit five or six hours a week to service and two or three additional hours for training and discipleship. To mobilize a volunteer organization like the local church requires real leadership skills. Here are some guidelines to help people move from bystanders to witnesses for Christ.
Church of God
Division of Church Ministries
Man in the Mirror Ministries